My ass hurts from sitting and doing homework. I'm studying my ass off and still procrastinating. Your keeping up with school and busy with work. Every night i go to sleep almost hating myself. I feel like i don't do enough homework to stay ahead. I feel like I don't exercise or eat right enough to feel healthy. I feel like I don't have enough motivation to hassle someone for a job. I feel like I don't appreciate our time together enough. A slow start to adulthood is really bumming me. I need to prove somehow i deserve the beautiful girl you are. What a joke my 18th year of life is. I feel as if i am drowned and am too deep to try? Is it too late? I'm virtually the first in the fam attempting the american way right? Almost no guidance. What gives? Is this normal? Is it part of the process? It rained today. I've realized it's been raining for a year and i juay haven't noticed. Life must be beautiful after a period of struggling invert.
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